Alternate Fairy-tale morals

Every child loves fairy tales. Since the days of Aesop, they have taught us lessons about human nature, like how patience is important and strangers are creepy.
But is this the only way to look at folk stories? Is the obvious moral also the only moral? Here are some other takes on favorite bedtime cautionary tales:


Title: Little Red Riding Hood
The Gist: A young girl tries to bring snacks to her grandmother in the woods. A wolf convinces her to procrastinate, eats the grandmother, dresses in the grandmother's clothes, then tricks Red Riding Hood and devours her as well. A huntsman finds the wolf and cuts him open, then pulls out Little Red and her grandmother. They fill the wolf's stomach with rocks as a kind of sick joke.
Morals: A real huntsman shivs first and asks questions later. A wolf in sheep's clothing is not as bad as a wolf in Grandma's clothing.


Title: Rapunzel
The Gist: A witch tricks a gardener into giving up his daughter, Rapunzel. The witch puts Rapunzel in a tower and refuses to let her get a haircut. A prince shows up and climbs Rapunzel's rope-like hair. The witch gets upset and blinds the prince. Rapunzel magically cures the prince's blindness with her tears.
Morals: Orphans make fantastic physicians. Love is blind, but only for a few minutes.
 
Title: Cinderella
The Gist: When Cinderella's mother dies, her father marries a raging harpie of a stepmother, and Cinderella becomes servant to her nasty stepsisters. Cinderella isn't invited to the ball, but her fairy godmother gives her a makeover and a sweet ride, and the prince hits on her. When Cinderella has to come home at midnight, she leaves a glass slipper behind. Her stepsisters cut off their toes to try and fit into the shoe, but the prince isn't fooled. He finds Cinderella and they live happily ever after.
Morals: Princes are horrible at remembering faces. Toe scars, like love, last forever.

Title: Hansel and Gretel
The Gist: Hansel and Gretel are left in the woods by (guess what?) their stepmother. They find a gingerbread house in the forest. The owner, a crazy witch, locks them in a cage and tries to force-feed them until they're fat enough to eat. The siblings manage to push the witch into an oven, where she is burned alive. Then they find their way home.
Morals: Cannibals don't build houses out of normal things like wood. Don't preheat the oven 'til absolutely necessary.

Title: Rumpelstiltskin
The Gist: For incredibly arbitrary reasons, a local king commands a peasant girl to spin straw into gold. If she doesn't, he'll execute her. A dwarf appears and says he'll do it for her, but she has to give up her firstborn child. The girl tries to get out of it, so the dwarf says he'll break the contract if she guesses his name (like, what?). She stalks the dwarf and finds out his name, then "guesses" it. Rumpelstiltskin is so angry that he tears himself in two.
Morals: Girls, beware of dwarves. Dwarves, beware of girls. Everyone, beware of kings? =D

(Source: Sparknotes.com)